I HOPE THIS EMAIL FINDS YOU PUNCHED IN THE MOUTH

Finally, a hat that speaks fluent passive aggression. Our “I hope this email finds you punched in the mouth” cap is the perfect blend of corporate politeness and unfiltered honesty. It’s ideal for anyone who has ever typed “per my last email” through gritted teeth. Professional enough for Zoom calls, savage enough for happy hour. Wear it to work, wear it to HR, wear it to family Thanksgiving—it’s the closest thing you’ll get to BCC-ing your enemies in real life.